The Family Reunion

Mom and dad’s favorite. The teacher’s pet. The top student. The model citizen. These are some of the names we give people who follows rules. They are recognized for their efforts to be perfect people. The question I want us to explore this morning is - what do each of these people get for being so perfect? What do they want?

For example, mom and dad’s favorite, do they do it because they want attention from mom and dad. As the favorite, he or she will get their ways with mom and dad. Is a teacher’s pet any different? Probably not. He or she likes the attention, but instead of getting their way, they receive a better grade. The same goes for the top student and a model citizen.

Here’s a question for you. Do you think mom and dad's favorite is a good and honest person? How about the teacher’s pet? Is either of them good and honest with no agenda?

In our story, the younger son wanted to take his inheritance and leave home. To be on his own. Go and find out who he is. Be an individual. Does this sound familiar? It does. This is our western culture. We teach our kids to be their “own individual.” For Hmong people, we want our kids to stay with us and take care of us. For the American culture, as soon as you turn eighteen, you want to live on your own. Become your own person. And now, all we hear from Hmong parents is that their kids never come and visit them. This doesn’t sound too bad, right?

For us Hmong, our child wanting to move out and leave the relatives being on their own is not a good thing. Our relatives are our support. They are who we are. We Hmong will also say this, “I raised you for eighteen years, and this is all I get. No appreciation. You want to just throw me on the side of the road like I was nothing to you.” I know this has been hard for Hmong parents, but it is our culture now. Over the years, parents have gotten used to it. Kids do this everywhere these days. It is a normal thing.